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Not a good guy to be with as they don't have the emotional fortitude to be your "rock" in hard times. They are independent, confident, have goals, know where they are going and once they commit, they are lifers with a woman that has the same goals and aspirations (a good woman).They will be your emotional rock, encourage and support you, have integrity by following through on what they say and give without expecting anything in return. This is what makes someone too easy or unattainable and part of attraction and desire (want what you can't have).I agree that no one is perfect but my ex had everything I wanted in a guy and what did I do? I take all of the good people for granted and regret it when I lose them for good. I would of probably been with someone already if I stopped tossing out all the ones who have been into me. My problem is usually the ones that don't show interest I want and the ones that do I find to be too easy..because I could just have them like that. These are the guys that end up in the friend zone and are great to vent to as they will listen to you just like your GF. Good guys - These guys respect themselves, set clear boundaries on what is acceptable, have a moral compass and really encompass the "good" parts of a bad guy and nice guy. They are usually referred to as players and bad boys.No guy sparks my interest and even if one does, it doesn't take me long until I get extremely bored and lose interest. I have a vision in my head of how my "dream" guy should be like. Every good person who has had interest in me I have proceeded to just get bored of or I just want something else. They won't put you on a pedistal like a nice guy would, be clingy, needy or easy. They may be fun short term but they will end up hurting you. Nice guys - These guys have no respect for themselves.
I don't think it had anything to do with any deep psychological stuff or 'commitment phobia' - just that the whole 'brand new' process is fun, and the type of connections that allow for truly lasting long term connections are not as common as people would like to think.Once the 'brand new' wears off, its time for a new 'brand new'.Infatuation fades, and when expectations and wishful thinking clear up in a couple of month's time - you find yourself sharing a bed with someone that you find you don't actually like as a person, and no longer find yourself wanting to pleasure or please anymore. I think that deep connections between people - the kind where you actually like and accept someone as an individual as well as a dating/sexual partner and not just a dating/sexual partner are a lot more rare than people think, and a good deal of relationships are basically prolonged 'brand new' situations that are endings waiting to happen, or are a case of people trying to convince themselves that what they have is the 'real deal' when actually they know deep down it isn't. I tried to have a relationship but te only thing I eer wanted from them was sex and it got boring sleeping with the same woman.After a while you realize they are not that exciting. __________________ The only philosophy which can be responsibly practised in face of despair is the attempt to contemplate all things as they would present themselves from the standpoint of redemption.They were challenging in the beginning, played their games with you, but when they dropped their guards and became human, you lost interest. I can count on one hand how many women in my past kept my interest long-term... - Theodor Adorno Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice.